I had a good think back at what was said to me during pregnancy and after pregnancy and had a chuckle at some of the things I was asked or told. Admittedly, i’ve even said some of these to new mums and had an unwelcoming response.
Let’s see if you have ever received any of these comments!
- Do not ever say to a new mum that you “feel tired“. I can tell you now, no matter how tired you are from an unusual late night or early start will be nothing compared to the tiredness that a new mum feels. Believe me, they are thinking in their head all of the reasons why you should not feel tired and they do.
- “What is your babies routine?” I was asked this one so many time whilst Mole was a new born. I don’t mind the question so much now, but as a new mum, I felt it added a lot of pressure on to me to be perfect. It was also impossible to get Mole into a good routine with her reflux being so bad.
- “What’s his/her name?” The majority of the time, Mole was always referred to as a boy. To be honest, I didn’t mind so much as it was an easy mistake to make. Babies all look the same when they are newborn. Mole wore unisex clothes and had no hair. However, I can see how other mums can take offence. There has even been times when Mole has been dressed head to toe in pink and still has been referred to as a “he”. I’m going to stick to questions like “What’s baby’s name?” or “What’s your name?” looking at the baby in future.
- “Have you tried feeding her?” when your baby is crying. Oh my word. Am I the only one who has been asked this question? Of course I have tried feeding my baby! What do you think I have been doing all night! This was so annoying when Mole’s reflux was really bad. She would cry so much and I felt like I was being given an abundance of advice that I really didn’t need.
- “It’s just the hormones.” Blaming my hormones on my right now is not exactly what I need as a new mum. I remember just thinking, “I don’t care if its the hormones, I need a hug and a little help around the house.”
So do any of those comments sound familiar? I think it is super easy to forget how intense being a new mum is. I’m 12 months on now, and due to me being pregnant with baby number 2, I’ve only just started to remember things.